Why I left social media

Somewhere just before the end of 2024, I was doing my daily scroll through my various social media accounts. And I was on a lot of them: Facebook. Instagram. Threads. Bluesky. TikTok. Slasher. I don't know if LinkedIn counts, but I'd dumped that one a month before.

Anyway, I was going through the accounts, and I honestly can't even tell you which platform it was, which post did it, or the ridiculously stupid response that I read, but I remember stopping and thinking, What am I doing? This is such a waste of time.

Because, also as usual, I should have been writing, but instead, here I was, unable to ignore the notifications, the checking of likes, of responses, the constant influx of information. I should have been writing. But instead, I was sacrificing my own projects for other people's thoughts.

And I realized, right at that moment, that I'd had enough. I was done.

I literally spent the next hour jumping through all the hoops of all the social media platforms, shutting them down. No warnings to my followers, nothing. Just, shut it all down.

I have to tell you, at the end of it, when I'd closed the last account, I sat back in my chair, and I heaved a very contented sigh.

Now, though this sounds like it was very spur of the moment, it really wasn't. The seeds had been planted months earlier. I mentioned a few times that I'd come close to getting off social media, and I was always met with the same arguments.

• We'll miss you.

• If you don't like the content, put some controls on...block people. Filter words. Rinse and repeat.

• But you won't be able to keep track of your friends!

• How are you going to sell your books?

• Just take a break for a week or a month instead.

Many were absolutely valid points. And I will say, right up from, that I did take many, many breaks from social media...but I usually came back, to my detriment.

And I did go in and filter the hell out of a lot of words. "Trump," "Project 2025," "Vance," "GOP," "Republican," "Democrat," "MAGA," "Tesla," "DOGE," "Elon Musk," "illuminati," and a whole bunch more—not all political. I also blocked a ton of sexually related stuff—"OnlyFans," "OF," and so on. I had a list that was a mile long. And I also blocked quickly and wantonly anyone who annoyed me in any way...and yes, that even included some longrunning friends (who, I might add, weren't happy with me).

And you know what? It only worked a little bit. You can block the shit out of all the Trump stuff, but someone's still going to screen cap a Truth Social or X post and stuff it on IG. And new terms constantly show up, too. "Tariff," anyone?

So, that wasn't working.

The other side was the element that just kind of...shows up like a Jehovah's Witness at your door, unwanted and unexpected. I've had a few crackpots in the past year, who were deliriously happy to talk shit about me, make up shit about me, post reprehensible shit about me, and dive into my DMs to excoriate me. I've been labeled a racist, a misogynist, an emotional blackmailer. I was told I was a "wet twig" and that I looked like I "ate meth for breakfast" and that I was a "poor fucking excuse for a male writer"...whatever the hell that means.

And really, if I have to put up with that, as well as constantly add more and more safeguards just to try and make it a somewhat pleasureable experience...is it worth it? Have we become so brainwashed that we'll keep taking these punches to the face, add another band-aid, and then squint our eyes in preparation for the next hit?

There was also the worry about not being able to sell my books online. Everyone knows the only way to do that is through social media, right?

Well...yes and no. I will say that, the one time I cut and pasted my very first 1-star review from Goodreads, I did sell something like seven books that day. ...of course, I also got ripped for trying to embarrass the person who posted the review (despite not including their name, or even which book it was from...and let's not forget, the review is on a public platform where literally anyone can see it). I made no fun of the reviewer and I was, in fact, quite pleased with their review.

But when I went back and looked at all the times I announced a new book, or did a cover reveal or offered up books for free in exchange for honest reviews...crickets. Not a single bite. Not a single sale. And rarely...very rarely...a single response for a free audiobook.

Contrast that to me posting a picture of my dog Murphy, where I'd get likes out the wazoo, and comments for days.

So, no sales, no reviews...no need to be on social media.

"But," you may ask, "don't you miss it?"

And my answer would be a resounding, "Hell no." I don't miss the arguments. I don't miss the flat-earthers. I don't miss the trumpeting trumpers and the preening poilievre fans. I don't miss the sarcasm, the hate, the anger, the willingness to pick a fight—and get really dirty about it—over the smallest thing. I don't miss the racism, the misogyny, the self-righteousness, the self-entitlement. I don't miss the narcissists and the sociopaths. I don't miss all those absolute idiots who are constantly pointing the finger for some behaviour or statement or belief...when they're doing the very same things. I don't miss the insults thrown my way...some from those who claimed to be friends.

And, being completely transparent, I did my fair share of reactionary, hate-filled, stupid commentary.

On social media, EVERY hill is a hill to die on, when you can hide behind a screen and keyboard. So, no. I don't miss it at all.

I did have a very small group of friends that I'd check in with on occasion. And you know what? The ones that actually give a shit about me (or noticed I'd left) reached out. Or I reached out to them. There's still a few I have to get in contact with, but overall, the lack of social media presence has not been a hardship.

On the contrary, it's been a blessing. Back around the end of 2015, the first time that fucking psychopath was elected into the White House, I left for many of the same reasons, as well as because I'd had two people in the horror community absolutely fuck me over, and I was done.

I only came back in mid-2022 because I was releasing my books. I didn't want to, but I did it. If only I knew then what I know now...

So I lasted, this time, what? About two and a half years? And in the three months I've been off it again, mentally I'm better. Less angry.

On the writing front, things have improved greatly. I've completed three short stories, finished editing one novel, finally got going again on two others, and I have ideas for three more short stories lined up.

And reading! My god, I had no idea how much time I lost by reading a few pages, then dropping into social media for an hour, then back to the book, then back to the phone. As of this writing, I'm literally in the middle of reading my 99th and 100th books of the year...and we're only 86 days into 2025.

I'm really tired of people seeing disinformation online, and then rebroadcasting it like it's gospel.

Since the late 1970s, Americans have, more and more, gorged themselves on garbage fast food, to the point now where something like 40% are obese.

And now, with the rise of social media, Americans (and yes, I realize it's a far more global issue, but the biggest issue is our noisy, overweight downstairs neighbours) are, more and more, gorging themselves on garbage information, delivered in quick, unsubstantiated soundbites, to the point where their brains are too lazy to exercise any critical thinking skills, preferring to accept the most ridiculous conspiracy theories as fact. And that's a behaviour that's spread to my own country as well.

It's making everyone very stupid...and it was making me stupid.

I can't deal with the stupid anymore. Mine, or anyone else's.

I can't escape it completely, but dumping social media is a good start. And on that note, I'll leave you with this last thought from David Armano: